Spark/Confidence?

Ooo just worked out how to blog from my phone which will make things easier!
Over the last couple of days I’ve been thinking hard about ‘the spark’… I’ve tried to equate it to confidence in the most part. Confidence in my self has probably been slowly diminishing for a while under the radar. I’m going to take the stance that although I can probably blame a few people and situations for affecting how I feel about myself, I can’t change others. I can only change myself and the way I react to these situations, which in turn will affect how others may treat me. I’m choosing to look forwards, rather than back and tracing my journey to a renewed confidence.
I took the opportunity to speak to my head of service about how I’ve been feeling at work which although totally awkward, hopefully helped bring some awareness to what I’m going through. It was really unnatural for me to open up to someone else, especially a senior manager, however it’s surprisingly good how it feels to being a bit more honest about my feelings. I’ve also opened up to some friends too, which has been great. Everyone has been really supportive and kind, and recommending things to do! I’ll certainly be filling this blog out soon!

Hello world!

Sometimes in life coincidences happen. Sometimes it sparks a smile at the random-ness and other times it can really make you think. This blog is the result of the latter and it’s all to do with the choice of words.

“You seem to have lost your spark…”

On the third occasion I heard this little phrase since 2012 began, the cogs in my mind started up, choked, started again and then slowed down until they settled on a quiet murmur, which isn’t bad seen as it’s quite clear they’ve not been used in a while! I’m choosing to take some comfort on the fact that some people thought I had a spark once, least I’ve something to aim for, but what it was and where I found it or lost it I’ve no idea.

In this blog I’m going to document my search for the missing piece. My disclaimer is that this blog is written mainly for me, and for the most part is going to be completely about me. I’m not normally this indulgent, self-centred or … lost!

I’m going to write about the experiences that I come across that invoke a reaction within me, starting with the things I already know I enjoy, food and music, and letting it develop from there. Wish me luck!